by Donna Poole
Our kids sang their Thanksgiving song for years when they were growing up, “Over the river and through the woods to Aunt Eve’s house we go!”
Those were the days, my friend. The guys borrowed tables and chairs from the church and set them up in Eve and Bruce’s basement. Women and girls crowded into the kitchen, laughing, talking, mashing potatoes, stirring gravy, and carrying a plethora of side dishes down the steep stairs to the basement where cousins played and waited for the feast to begin. Love, laughter, and gratitude filled the house. And then we quieted as Bruce prayed before we ate; God was with us, and we really thought those days would never end.
But end they did. Six years ago, Eve lost her battle with ovarian cancer and our hearts broke.
Thanksgiving moved to our home. I knew it would never be the same without Eve, and it wasn’t, but still, it was good to be together. The first year without Eve we shared some tears. There were tears too when a nephew lost his battle with cancer, but still, we found comfort, healing, and even joy in a day spent together thanking God for each other.
This year cancer came to visit me. I didn’t want to give up Thanksgiving, but I didn’t know how I could do it either. I shouldn’t have worried; our sweet daughter-in-law Mindy offered to host it. But then one family after another got sick and our beloved patriarch, Bruce, entered the hospital. For the first time in decades our family will not be going over the river and through the woods to gather anywhere to celebrate our blessings.
Our youngest daughter, Kimmee, lives with us, so she and her husband will celebrate Thanksgiving with John and me.
“Mom,” Kimmee said to me, “I’m sad. This is the first Thanksgiving of my life I won’t see Danny.”
I had a hard time holding back tears. Danny is our youngest son, and Mindy is his wife. We have four children, and they haven’t all been able to spend every Thanksgiving with us, but both Danny and Kimmee have. This is the first time since he was born that we won’t see Danny on Thanksgiving. It’s the first time since he married Mindy that we won’t see her. It’s the first time since their kids were born that we won’t see them! Megan, our oldest grandchild, has spent twenty-one Thanksgiving days with us.
Get a grip, Donna! Thanksgiving is not the time to whine and dine.
This year, the infamous 2020, forces me to dig deeper to find gratitude and joy. Since I started writing this article Bruce closed his eyes here and opened them in heaven. We cry because Bruce will never again join us at our Thanksgiving table or any table here, but we rejoice because we’ll join him where no shadow of sorrow will dim joy. Still, I’m tired of saying goodbye to people I love.
Since I started writing this our plans for Thanksgiving dinner for four evaporated. One of us has Covid-19 and pneumonia and is confined to his room, and the other three of us are in quarantine. We decided to wait for turkey and trimmings until we can sit together at a table.
Thanksgiving doesn’t look anything like I wanted it to. The year 2020 doesn’t look like anyone wanted it to!
So what now? Pity party time? Mindy sent me a great devotional today from proverbs31.org. In “Life is Too Short to Live Unhappy,” Tracie Miles wrote, “We can still make the intentional choice to be thankful for the life we have, even if it looks different than we want it to.”
I’m grateful for a loving, caring, wonderful family and church family. I’m grateful for a God who loves me and sent His Son to die for my sins, even my sin of silly ingratitude about one day that looks nothing like what I’d planned. I’m grateful for my husband of fifty-one years who has walked through fire and hasn’t lost his boyish sense of humor. I’m grateful for Kimmee who lives here and cooks and cleans and spoils me rotten. I’m grateful for the spectacular sunsets we’ve enjoyed this November. My gratitude list is endless!
And I’m grateful for you. Some of you started wandering these backroads with me from my first blog on November 3, 2019. We had no idea where those ramblings would take us, did we?
So, for Thanksgiving 2020, let’s dig deeper. We’ll find gratitude and joy.
Thanksgiving 2021 will come. I’m planning on a full house. But for this year, I share with you something that made me laugh when I saw it on Facebook:
“As for me and my house we will stay where we at.”—1st Isolations 24:7